It took a huge loss for us to realise that all we'd planned for was unimportant.

I think you may have read Rachel Fefer's accounts of the many times she came close to death, (once she did die) and I could add a few of my own, so why would you grind yourself so?

I've reached a stage in my life where I don't value things, but friendships, well, if you don't have those you have nothing.

Your friend has lost track of time. One day he may realise, but there again, he may not live to realise.

It's the pockets in the shroud thing.

Rachel's post, just in case you didn't read it.

https://medium.com/@r.a.fefer/you-could-die-tomorrow-are-you-ready-a0479b06d5d2