I think in time your will stop hurting. You may even allow anger to be present at time. That is pretty understandable.
Allow yourself these emotions.
I met a young girl, a lawyer, recently.
Her uncle was a hugely-successful businessman, but something happened and one by one the businesses crumbled like a pack of Dominoes. The family knew nothing of this.
He had always indulged his family (wife and two girls) and on this occasion took them to this expensive resort.
The women went shopping, and on their return found the bathroom was locked.
Turns out he had suicided.
What an awful thing for young women to experience, or for anyone, to be honest.
So pleased to know you're newly-married and that your little boy is doing so well.
Good luck with the business. I'm sure you will have much to share with those you try to help. πππ